


Johnny Mundo's Bag O' Fun

by Daisy1600



Category: Lucha Underground
Genre: But.. Puma/Trevor ain't so innocent either, Crack Fic, Funny, Johnny is INSANE, Konnan (Professional Wrestling) - Freeform, Literal Crack, M/M, Mentions of Sex, They're police officers/partners, btw 'Koko' is Konnan, mentions of public nudity, theres use of cocaine lol, usage of drugs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-29
Updated: 2017-08-29
Packaged: 2018-12-21 12:29:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,219
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11944230
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Daisy1600/pseuds/Daisy1600
Summary: When Johnny steals a five pound bag of cocaine from the evidence locker at work and his partner Puma/Trevor has a smooth, strong back he wants to snort a line off of as he sleeps soundly on his front after a good shag.





	Johnny Mundo's Bag O' Fun

After some really #Sweatysex, Trevor had fallen asleep face down on his partner in crime fighting's bed. The perfect opportunity for.. Johnny to snort a line of coke right off the grand canyon sized groove running down the entirety of his smooth, muscled back. 

Mundo got outta bed, reaching into the middle drawer of his dresser and pulling out a whopping five-pound bag of crack cocaine he'd gotten from the evidence locker at work. He ripped a large hole in the side of the bag, causing it spill everywhere and get in his eyes and mouth and making him choke and hack and spit on the floor until he stopped dying. He could've overdosed right then and there! 

"Ah, **fuck!** Its like I'm baking a fucking cake in here.." he yelled then lowered his voice as to not wake up his sleeping partner who happened to have passed the fuck out after being, well, _fucked_ all night. Like, banging the headboard into the wall a million times kinda fucked. 

He looked to the slumped over form of the copper and smiled to himself. He may've gotten a bit of the coke in his nose... okay, _a lot_. He tiptoed over to his little kitten -a Puma to be specific- and began pouring the white substance all along the.. the sexy groove running down the length of his back all the way down to the cleft of his ass. 

"Oh, yeah, baby. Mundo gun get fucked uppp!" He said before pouring the rest of the coke onto his bedsheets and allowing the bag to fall to the floor with a soft crinkle sound that bags typically make. "I'm like.. so turned on, it's not even funny, Poom Poom." 

He reached a handsy hand into his back pocket and felt around until... well, he felt around until he realized he wasn't wearing any pants and was really just violating himself. 

"Ah, fuck! I'm getting old." He chided himself before running into the hallway and looking everywhere for where on god's green earth he discarded his pants until a thought hit him upside the head like a rust-coated crowbar! 

The elevator. 

He ran outta his apartment stark naked, his thingy flopping around as it pleased until he smacked face first into the communal elevator. He yelled really loudly at himself then picked himself back up, opening the door to the metal box of death, and finding his blue jeans with bejeweled pockets torn in half. Damn, Poom's really gotta cut his talons shorter or else he may lose something... more important soon. 

He took a hundred dollar bill outta his torn up wallet coated in a thick layer of.. well, it was covered in _something_. Anyway, the nasty little fuck grabbed his blood-money he'd, again, stolen from the evidence locker at work, and ran back to his apartment before his old-lady neighbor could open her door and catch a glimpse of his winky. 

He slammed the door as loudly as he could so his neighbors wouldn't come knocking and asking for, I don't know, a fuck? Maybe a brain cell or two? Well, whatever. He has a gun, so these MOFO's don't wanna go grabbing at his cock if they know what's good for them. 

"Sure hope my sweet little kitten didn't wake up." He peeked inside his bedroom, fingers holding the doorframe so tightly it pulled some of it off and he watched as it slowly crumbled and fell to the floor. Looks like a juicy pile of co- No, he was gonna save his nostrils for the groove running down his kitten's smooth, strong back. The back he may of may not've got himself off on earlier by rubbing his angry-red cock into the groove until he spilled his seed and lapped it off with his large tongue.  
Poom was still sleeping, so he decided to just stomp as loudly as he wanted to until he was straddling the younger back, now at full-staff. 

He rolled up his hundred dollar bill nice and tight, much like something else he owns... and leaned over until it was positioned directly below his partner's neck where his... his _groove_ begins, and placing his right nostril over it. 

"So sexy-" he said just before he began snorting the white powder up his nose, all the while running the rolled up currency down his... fucking grand canyon groove, and ending at the cleft of his tight hole that belonged to him. Okay, he didn't sign a contract of anything, but he'd like to think he did. It was definitely a lot sexier that way. 

And just as he went slack and his full weight flopped upon his partner's back, said partner woke the fuck up. 

"What the fuck shit are you doing, John? We already already did the doo-doo, like, twice already. Get off, man!" He tried moving around, then full on flipped over until Johnny-boy fell on the floor and probably died from an overdose. 

"God, Koko was, like, soo right about you." Trevor kept rolling until he fell off the bed onto his partner, and literally _feeling_ all the air escape his body at once. All the air. He's fucking dead, yo. 

"And why the **hell** is there white shit all over my god damned body and the bed!?" He screamed in his dead partner's face. 

He finally got off his corpse that was sure to be shitting and pissing soon, and stood up, walking over to the mirror and practically crying at what had been done to his poor Grand Canyon groove. It's been #Soiled by the likes of crack cocaine! Bastaro in the house; and his name is Lucifer- oops, sorry, he prefers to go by: Johnny Mundo. It rolls off the tongue a lot smoother. 

Then, feeling the slightest ittiest bit of remorse a person _could_ feel, he went back over to Mundo in the pitch-ass black room and knelt down until his head was touching his baby-ass soft chest. "Ah, fuck! Why'd you have to die on me _before_ I could even marry you for your money then stage a suicide that I imagined would look a hell of a lot like this? Heh, you really _are_ selfish, aren't you?"

He was about to grab as many valuable items around his partner's apartment as he could carry, when the _idiota_ suddenly sprang to life! And not just his winky. 

"Haven't you ever heard up people dying for a minute after taking too big of a hit, Trevy?" Johnny said, one eye shut and the other backwards as he crawled over to his partner who dropped the large box of magnum condoms from his hands in surprise. 

"N-no..." Trevor mumbled, scuffling a lone toenail across the wooden flooring of the Mundo-apartmenthold. 

"Well, I'm back baby. Let's put those coco's to good use!" 

Trevor chuckled nervously, but went along with his partner's plan all the same. And this time, as they rocked together into the wee hours of the morning, it was Johnny's little kitten who snorted the shit off his six-pack that looked as if Jesus had carved them himself. But c'mon, they were _nothing_ compared to Poom Poom's eight pack- sorry, what I had _meant_ to say was; his ice-cube tray abs of steel that were chiseled by _God_.


End file.
